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Nov. 30th, 2015 05:49 pmi've definitely got Imposter's Syndrome.
In the past six months or so, i've been promoted to Head of Development. i received a ten percent raised immediately, and then the boss wasn't satisfied with how much she was paying me, so she told me to come up with a new number. i sweated that for a bit, and my dad died during the same time frame, but we eventually settled on another twenty percent.
i've got four developers and two high-school interns (one of which is as good as a full-time developer) that report to me, and i'm not coding anymore. Oh, i try to keep up with the tools, but i'm constantly pulled away to other tasks. This morning, i spent about an hour discussing how we're going to reorganize our shared file structure. :-/
It feels like the developers are doing all of the work, and my input is best reserved for questions of design -- user interface and interaction.
We decided to switch from using Objective-C to Swift for iOS development, but that was after my promotion, so i haven't had much time to learn Swift, and i certainly don't have a chance to practice on a current project, so i can't be a resource there.
In addition, we've decided to broaden our platforms to include web apps, which can play on desktop browsers, mobile browsers and -- most importantly -- Chromebooks. (Many school systems use Chromebooks, and the iOS app store is a hurdle to others.) My web programming experience is about six years old at this point, although i'm doing better than i am with Swift.
i saw something recently that presented Impostor Syndrome as a Venn diagram with two areas. The first area was "making it look easy" and the second area was "discounting it's value". The overlap was labelled, "Impostor Syndrome".
Importantly, nobody seems to have any criticisms about my work. i've asked the boss if she had any, and she had none. Dayle actually told me that i'm making it look easy. The developers that report to me don't seem to have any issues, and the work is getting done.
There are days when i'm busy -- when i leave the office thinking, "that was a good day". Then there are days when i wonder how i'm contributing. It's likely that i just need more time to acclimate to my new role. Already, things that i was hesitant about are becoming more comfortable, like conducting job interviews.
At any rate, my job doesn't seem to be at risk anytime soon. The last Head of Development set the bar very low. i'd have to screw up quite a bit to lose this position. i'm sure i'll get more comfortable with things. After all, i'm certainly not the first person to feel this way.
In the past six months or so, i've been promoted to Head of Development. i received a ten percent raised immediately, and then the boss wasn't satisfied with how much she was paying me, so she told me to come up with a new number. i sweated that for a bit, and my dad died during the same time frame, but we eventually settled on another twenty percent.
i've got four developers and two high-school interns (one of which is as good as a full-time developer) that report to me, and i'm not coding anymore. Oh, i try to keep up with the tools, but i'm constantly pulled away to other tasks. This morning, i spent about an hour discussing how we're going to reorganize our shared file structure. :-/
It feels like the developers are doing all of the work, and my input is best reserved for questions of design -- user interface and interaction.
We decided to switch from using Objective-C to Swift for iOS development, but that was after my promotion, so i haven't had much time to learn Swift, and i certainly don't have a chance to practice on a current project, so i can't be a resource there.
In addition, we've decided to broaden our platforms to include web apps, which can play on desktop browsers, mobile browsers and -- most importantly -- Chromebooks. (Many school systems use Chromebooks, and the iOS app store is a hurdle to others.) My web programming experience is about six years old at this point, although i'm doing better than i am with Swift.
i saw something recently that presented Impostor Syndrome as a Venn diagram with two areas. The first area was "making it look easy" and the second area was "discounting it's value". The overlap was labelled, "Impostor Syndrome".
Importantly, nobody seems to have any criticisms about my work. i've asked the boss if she had any, and she had none. Dayle actually told me that i'm making it look easy. The developers that report to me don't seem to have any issues, and the work is getting done.
There are days when i'm busy -- when i leave the office thinking, "that was a good day". Then there are days when i wonder how i'm contributing. It's likely that i just need more time to acclimate to my new role. Already, things that i was hesitant about are becoming more comfortable, like conducting job interviews.
At any rate, my job doesn't seem to be at risk anytime soon. The last Head of Development set the bar very low. i'd have to screw up quite a bit to lose this position. i'm sure i'll get more comfortable with things. After all, i'm certainly not the first person to feel this way.
